I admit it. I have a problem. Well, I have many, but this one has just shown its ugly head to me while we’ve been on vacation. I am addicted to the scale. Not in a do-anything-I-can-to-lose-weight way, but I do weigh myself an inordinate amount. I wake up, I weigh myself. I feed our daughter, I weigh myself. I pee (yes, I went there- did you expect anything less from me?), I weigh myself.

Don’t get me wrong. This is not an all out mission to watch the scale creep ever lower with each check. I eat like a normal person. Since I’m still breastfeeding, I actually eat MORE than the normal Weight Watchers member. I just find in fascinating to see the effects of each meal, sleep, feed, etc. I don’t get freaked out if it’s higher than my last WW weigh-in, because I am a card-carrying believer in the system. If you track your points and stay within the limits, work out at least 3 times a week and then pray like hell to whichever god/idol/Elvis statue you choose, you will lose weight. I have been steadily losing weight since I started, so why would a little spike on the scale freak me out?

It does do one thing for me. It helps me to go to my weigh-in/meeting confident in the outcome, give or take a few ounces. Here’s the thing. I have been on vacation now for nine days, and it’s been ten days since my last weigh-in. I’m using one of my “free week” coupons as we were away for last week’s weigh-in, but I have a weigh-in coming up 28 hours after we get home and I have NO IDEA what the scale will say. I haven’t been able to weigh myself for over a week. I am petrified!

I have been pretty damned good this vacation, staying within my points limits almost every day and I’ve been to the gym three times plus walking everywhere. (Don’t boo and hiss me just yet – tonight I enjoyed three glasses of wine and a piece of cheesecake. Four points over and worth every one.)

I’m sure it’s not COMPLETELY healthy to weigh oneself that much, and I know “it’s not about the number it’s about how you feel,” bladdy bladdy blah. I really do just get a kick out of analyzing the effects of a day well lived. Let’s call it scientific research. Or being a complete and utter control freak.

It definitely does remind me to stay on track, and this is where I am a little worried. I set myself a goal before we left. I’m currently at 36.6lbs lost and as I’m missing one week’s weigh-in, I believe it’s possible that I could indeed reach the big 4-0 at my next weigh-in. 3.4lbs over two weeks is completely doable, right? Right?

Oh well, if I’m not there this week I’ll get there next week. I’m not worried. And I will NOT use my other “free week” coupon to avoid a bad weigh-in.

After all, it’s not about the number, etc etc … although Weight Watchers doesn’t hand out “I fit into my wedding dress again” charms for your little keychain. Maybe they should.