“You’re doing it wrong.”  These were the words that greeted me through the kitchen window this morning as I started to lay some bricks as a border to a small patch of grass I intended to seed. “Stop. You’re doing it wrong.” This just might be the most useless constructive criticism on the planet. Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband more than anything in the world (or at least tied with my kids), but he’s not always the most tactful when offering advice.

“Why? What’s wrong about it?” I asked. “You’re just doing it wrong” was the answer back. Thanks, got that the first time you said it. Let’s work on moving this conversation forward a little, shall we? However because he was busy with work and kids under foot, that’s pretty much where the conversation stopped.

He should really know better. It’s not like he just met me.

If I want something done I typically just go ahead and do it. Where I don’t need Mr. Awesome’s brute strength and technical know-how, I usually just plow ahead. I’m not much of a “measure twice-cut once” type of girl. Yes, this usually sometimes leads to mistakes, irreparable damage, and almost always ridicule from Mr. Awesome (if I haven’t already erased or disposed of all evidence before he finds out).

It’s mostly because I’m hopelessly impatient. I don’t want to wait around for him to be ready to help me do something on his schedule, I want it done NOW. And my bright ideas aren’t always the disasters I’ve made them out to be. We have a number of items around our home, garden, my office, etc that have been my “projects” that actually ended up decently enough to be displayed. (Note to anyone that knows me personally that is reading this – I will NOT be speaking of the recently crafted table lamp.)

And if you happen to catch me mid-project and tell me “You’re doing it wrong,” you should know full well that this will only make me more determined to finish it and prove you wrong. I WILL finish it, and DAMMIT it’s going to look GOOD. And if it doesn’t, you’d better NEVER bring it up again.

So back to this morning. I was under the gun as I wanted to get the seed sown before the forecast afternoon rain, because in true “me” fashion I had decided the project would be done today so BY GOD it was going to get done today. Being the good wife and professional communicator that I am, I called Mr. Awesome outside a few minutes later and calmly asked him to explain the issues and what I might do better. We reached a point of understanding and the project continued. The bricks were laid, the soil was spread, the seed was sown.

It’s now 8pm and I’m still waiting for that bloody forecast rain.

Um hello? Mother Nature? You’re doing it wrong.